I would like to see a love yourself movement. I do not mean a selfish, it is all about me, people should give me things, owe me things movement, in fact I believe we already have way too much of that going on in our society. I am talking about people starting to get to know and love who they are.
When I was married, I spent many hours, days, weeks etc. making sure that he knew that he was loved, that he was worth loving; but in the process I lost myself, and forgot that I was worth loving too.
After my divorce I had to rediscover who I was, and in the process I learned to love who I was, the good and the flaws. I learned a lot about myself, this knowledge helped me to care less about what others opinions of me were, and my health and outlook on life improved.
Yet with the busyness of life, I have let that love and care for myself slip away. I find myself waking up grumpy in the morning, people’s opinions of me have become more important than they should, and my insecurities have skyrocketed. I have resorted back to bad habits, habits that make me feel sluggish, drained and make me feel even worse about myself. I have started missing who I was, when I loved me, I miss the fun and confidence, I miss me!
I was talking with a close friend over dinner, and I mentioned this to her. We talked about how I have found myself drowning in clutter, in things that I thought would make me happy by buying them, but how that feeling was fleeting, how I have taken to eating “special treats” that I did not really want, that left me feeling empty. How important other people’s opinions of me had seemed to become. I was surprised when she nodded and agreed, she had recently been struggling with similar issues. As we talked about this I told her I just want to love me again! I and you and she are worth knowing, we all have something good about us. We should love ourselves. How are we supposed to show others and the world around us love and kindness if we do not even show ourselves those things?
Loving ourselves is not an easy thing to do. We must love not only the good, positive, glowing things about us; but we must embrace those dark recesses of our failures, scars, fears and imperfections that we so desperately try to hide from the world around us. This can sometimes be a daunting task; it seems it is easier, at times, to forgive others than it is to forgive ourselves. Unless we forgive ourselves, accept, even love our flaws, and embrace ourselves, it is hard to let someone else embrace us. Yet by loving ourselves maybe we will be able to love other people, even love their insecurities, flaws, and scars, to love them just the way they are.
So today I am going to start loving me, I am worth my love. I will embrace my insecurities, love my attributes, and relearn what makes me happy. It is not always easy, and there will be times that fail, or slide backwards, but I know that in the end I am worth it.